Pink My Ride

THE HORROR!!!! Beware my friends – there is a villain among us. Turn your back for a second and your precious racing machine could be violated in the most heinous manner. Take heed. Don’t let this happen to you (WARNING: The following image may be disturbing to some viewers):

The therapy alone is costing a fortune.

The perpetrator is still at large and can likely be found lurking somewhere near the Hello Kitty display at the local stationary shop, likely accompanied by an accomplice. Other offences include the merciless humiliation of a classic Bianchi road bike back in July of 2010. Any and all leads are greatly appreciated. For now, the identity of this brutal serial stickerer is a complete and baffling mystery.